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When Jim Carrey announced the nominees for Best Motion Picture in Comedy at the 2017 Golden Globes Ceremony, he made a joke that everyone in the room knew was all too real. He said: “You know, when I go to sleep at night, I'm not just a guy going to sleep. I'm two-time Golden Globe winner, Jim Carrey, going to get some well-needed shuteye. And when I dream, I don't just dream any old dream. No sir. I dream about being three-time Golden Globe-winning actor, Jim Carrey. Because then I would be enough. It would finally be true. And I could stop this terrible search for what I know ultimately won't fulfill me.” Cue nervous laughter. Most people go through life trying to find a sense of self-worth. Like the two-time Golden Globe winner who keeps striving in the hope that the third Golden Globe will make them feel like they’re enough, we keep hoping that whatever we’re giving ourselves to will eventually make us feel like we matter. When do you think that you’ll feel like you’re worth something?
When you’re successful enough?
Measuring our worth based on how successful we are starts while we’re still in diapers and hear parents and relatives comparing our progress with less or more capable siblings and peers. Then in school, the grades come, and we hear the not-so-subtle message that we’re as good as our last test. We learn to perform for whatever makes the adults cheer and end up entering adulthood determined to achieve to prove our value. But as Jim Carrey experienced, the achievements are never enough. There’s always someone who’s accomplished more and, even when people reach the top, the fear of failure always spoils the satisfaction of the achievements. Do you look to your accomplishments to prove that you have value?
When you’re attractive enough?
We can’t escape the power of beauty around us. Studies say that cuter kids get more attention from teachers. The opposite is also true, unfortunately. By middle school, most kids have their eyes opened to the influence that the right look can command. In adulthood, looks can be translated into social influence and financial power. Many people will diet and exercise not so much to just be healthier but to prove their value through their body shape. But it’s a game that few people feel like they can win. Even those who do, experience the reality that Joan Collins expressed: “The problem with beauty is that it's like being born rich and getting poorer.” Do you look to your looks to prove that you have value?
When you’re popular enough?
Some people measure their worth by the number of friends they have. All it takes is a cruel person who can sense that you crave acceptance to make you feel utterly worthless. Even the urgency with which people respond to your texts or posts can feel like a price tag on you as an individual. Then dating and romance come in and only ratchet up the stakes. Do you look to your popularity to prove that you have value?
The alternative
The Bible presents a completely unique alternative. In it, God reveals Himself as our Creator and shows that He accepts us as we are because He made us the way we are. It says, “It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture” (Psalm 100:3). People try to make us fit into their mold to earn their acceptance, but God never asks us to try to be someone else. He calls Himself our Father in heaven because He values us the way that a parent does a newborn baby. A baby’s value to their parents is in belonging to them not performing for them. Parents love their babies in spite of what they do, not because of it! God says, “Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you” (Isaiah 49:15). Just reading those words don’t change a person. When you put your faith in the God who spoke them, they take on a new significance, however. By choosing to trust what God has said and deliberately feed your hunger for self-worth in God’s eyes rather than the harsh appraisal of the world, God can make you finally feel like you’re worth something. As Jesus said, “Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows” (Luke 12:6-7).
If this is new to you and you think it’s something you’d like to explore, I’ve written a free, 12-week course called The Unstuck Life that walks you through the essentials of Jesus’ teachings in daily, bite-sized messages that you can read or watch by video. To learn more, go to www.gracebc.ca/getunstuck.
In awe of Him,
Paul
